Working from Home with Toddlers

March 2020 is a month that most of us will never forget. Among many other things, most of us are involuntarily working from home. Being that nearly all daycares and schools have closed, many parents now also have the added adjustment of working from home with toddlers. I’ve had jobs where I traveled for 80% of my week, while still having work to complete either from a hotel or at home at night. I’ve also worked from home when my children are sick, for weeks prior to maternity leave, and for a variety of other reasons.

In all of these roles I forced myself to become incredibly organized in order to highly perform at work and to be able to identify and take advantage of free time in my day. So, much like when I shared my tips for “Taking a 3 Year Old to the Movies”, I’d love to share my favorite tips for Working from Home with Toddlers.

Tip #1 Create Your Space

The first thing to do, is create your home office area. Make sure you’re totally comfortable doing work in your space. My husband and I normally don’t work from home on the same day, so sharing one cramped desk in the corner of our bedroom just wasn’t going to cut it. We opted to use our empty loft/3rd bedroom as a makeshift office space and play area.

The room has a television in the corner, two desks on opposite sides for the adults, and an open play area in the middle of the room. We recently added an indoor bounce house to half of the area, but it’s still pretty open. Here are a few items to consider purchasing or digging up for your office space:

Second Monitor (Thrift Store / Amazon)
Desk (if you don’t have a table or other space to repurpose)
Wireless Mouse (Amazon)
Mouse Pad with Wrist Rest (Amazon)
Keyboard Wrist Wrest (Amazon)
Wireless Headphone with Mic (Amazon)
Surge Protectors and Extra Charger Blocks with USB ports (Amazon)

While this is space for work to be done, it’s important to make sure that the kids can have fun here too. They will be around you during important calls or when your spouse may be unavailable.

Tip #2 Plan ahead

I typically pop open both my phone calendar and my Happy Planner on Sunday nights to plan my week. My husband and I share the phone calendar and it is strictly for appointments and meetings. My paper planner is only for my own work schedule, the kids schedule, and it houses my to-do list. I start out by adding my own meetings/events from my work calendar. Then, I follow up with my husband to pencil in his meetings or school assignment deadlines. This allows me to identify any conflict where we both will be unavailable at the same time while the kids are awake. If that happens, I either try to reschedule something, or I just let my boss know ahead of time that I will be on mute for the call. So far, we haven’t had a major conflict for anything urgent.

Based on our work schedule, I am then able to make a schedule for the kids. I typically only make their schedule the night before – in case things change at work, which they often do. My husband and I decide amongst ourselves who will do what with the kids so that we can still make time to actually work on assignments that aren’t meetings.

For example, someone makes breakfast and does our morning routine. Someone will also handle lunch and afternoon activities. This could be the same someone or different ones depending on the day.

So far we have tried morning stretches and exercises, games with sight words, puzzles, shop keeper, read books, done math, and a variety of other things. While one person facilitates the activity, the other person gets some work done. We typically come together for meals and after the work day is over.

Tip #3 Get dressed!

I picked up this tip from my friend The Fly Lady – and it makes such a difference! Everyday, get up and get dressed “down to your shoes”. You don’t have to wear business casual or do your hair and makeup, but get dressed. Get out of your pajamas, put on some casual clothes and shoes, even a little perfume, and get going. I’m not sure why this helps me to start working, cooking, or cleaning at home – but it does!

Tip #4 Keep their hands busy

Toddlers love to do things with their hands. They can’t wait to draw, build things, and tear things apart. So, let them! They can do 1,000 things with Dollar Store paper cups, crayons, and scraps of paper. I also find that letting them help me make lunch is super exciting for them. Whether it’s taking grapes off the vine, mixing up their own tuna salad, or helping me put the fruit into a blender for smoothies, they really enjoy it.

Plus, they can zone out doing a few projects on their own so that you can get some work done. They may even work quietly!

Tip #5 Never skip nap time

There are a ton of posts out there about not putting your kids on a strict schedule while working from home. I agree…for the most part. While working from home with toddlers nap time should never be skipped for your own sanity. Normally, if we have had a relaxed morning I encourage the kids to jump around in the bounce house or turn on some music and let them dance for a half hour. If you can run around in your backyard or go for a walk do that. At some point in the day, they have got to burn off some energy for health purposes and so they will be more willing to take a nap. My older toddler is resistant some days – so we have compromised. She can choose to quietly “read” in her bed until her sister wakes up.

Skipping nap time tends to result in tantrums and uncontrollable or explainable crying at later points in the day.

Nap time is when I choose to do a variety of things. I respond to emails that I wasn’t able to digest early in the morning. This is also when I normally tackle assignments with hard deadlines. If for some reason I’m wiped out from the day, I will choose to relax or take a nap for a half hour. Regardless of what working from home used to look like, those rules have gone out the window now that children are involuntarily part of the equation.

Tip #6 Don’t forget about snacks

While it may seem that our kids are asking for snacks all day long, we really should take a step back and think about their normal day. My toddlers’ daycare sends detailed reports of their schedule each day and I pay special attention to what they eat.

In the morning, they normally have a grain of some type as well as fruit and some type of protein for breakfast. Before lunch, they have a snack that is usually a grain and a fruit. For lunch, they have had a variety of things from enchiladas to peanut butter and jelly wraps to spaghetti. They are given 1-2 more snacks depending on what time they get picked up.

Their meals are well rounded and filling. They can have as much as they can eat, within reason, to my knowledge. Think about the snacks you offer your children. Do you limit them because they aren’t healthy? A bag of Cheetos isn’t really a great snack choice. One apple, isn’t even really a snack. An apple with peanut butter and a few crackers – that’s a better one. What are they eating for lunch and how many food groups are present in their daily nutrition at home?

Toddlers, as we know, have trouble managing their emotions already. Sometimes they have tantrums or cry and the reason is that they’re just hungry.

Tip #7 Pay attention to when you stop paying attention

This is so important and so easily forgotten. Despite our best efforts, we get caught up in our work. Before we know it we have spent 20-30 minutes in silence, with our toddlers walking around getting into things due to boredom. Our first reaction as parents is normally to get upset or punish them. Keep in mind that there are tons of things at daycare and school to hold your toddler’s attention, including their friends. This is a big adjustment for our kids too.

While it will be tough, we have to make sure if they aren’t napping that we recognize when they’ve had too much time to themselves. A quick game or activity will go a long way.

Tip #6 Be Realistic

I’ve struggled with this tip myself. While our managers and coworkers with older kids seem to be in a similar working from home boat, they really aren’t (but I also don’t know anything about the boats they ARE in). Taking care of toddlers, especially more than one, is a full time job! I know because we pay our daycare a ton of money to do it every week.

While I want to do a great job at work, my family will always come first. If it comes to it, I have no issue telling my manager that I can’t lead a call or unmute as much and remain professional with my kids in the background. It’s up to him if he minds our clients hearing it or not. I also already know for a fact that I can’t work continuously in the way I’m used to unless my kids are asleep or with their father. I just try to keep my phone near me at at all times and address more urgent emails or IMs from there until I can get to my laptop.

Parents, we can only do the best we can. As much as we would like to believe we can have the same level of productivity and performance we always have – we just can’t right now! The exception would be that you have a spouse, family member, or nanny whose only purpose is to watch your kids while you work.

Take this time to get to know your toddlers. Grow your patience and kindness. Be silly. Don’t stress yourself out about work norms and optics – this is a new season for everyone. Its been my experience that people treat you how you tell them to. Make sure people know that you have limits. Pretending that things are normal will only cause you to become more frustrated at your children.

Bonus Tip #6 Respect your Spouse

For the married folks – remember that your spouse is struggling with working from home with toddlers just like you are! Neither of your jobs is more important than the other. Make time to plan your schedules out and be considerate of one another. You may have to move an important meeting or sacrifice your lunch time because of a scheduling mishap. You may even have to work after everyone is asleep because that’s how the chips fell that day. We really can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. Rely on Him and rest in the strength of God’s might. Its not on us to do this on our own.

That’s it – those are my tips for working from home with toddlers. Let me know if they helped any of you in the comments!